louxxlouxx

Hey guys, I haven’t been online for a little while.  The past couple of weeks have just been terrible diet wise.  I haven’t stuck to it properly, and not really through too much temptation I just haven’t been sticking to it for some strange reason! I missed my weigh in last week cuz I wanted to put it right this week and wasn’t willing to face up to a possible gain, but I wish I had gone now.  Even if I had gained it would have at least set me back on track cuz now I face going back with a greater gain.  So I am def going to my weigh in on tues and am just gonna start it again I think.

 I am gonna take my buddy Sue’s advice and kinda combine the slimming world plan and the no s one.  I am gonna allow myself 10syns on weekdays to use only on meals so I can do the no snack thing for no s, and at weekends I am gonna allow myself 15syns to use on a treat and not bother counting syns with meals (as long as they are 3 fairly healthy ones! in the way that I would with No S in the week).  

I have kinda got to a stage now where being overweight is having a huge impact on my entire life.  My confidence is really low at the moment, and I just feel generally unhappy about everything.  I finished my 1st year uni exams last week (yay) so now I am on the lookout for a summer job, and seeing as at my age most of the typical jobs I go for involve a uniform, you can imagine I am pretty anxious about that too.  I guess it is cuz in the past I have asked for 18s but now I am in a 20 really but I don’t think I feel comfortable saying that! Plus at my age I should go for any job I can but like, recently I was gonna go for a job as a part time “playground” assistant at this place that is for children with special needs, but one of the requirements was “good level of physical fitness” so I couldn’t even bear to send in the application.  Now I am going to apply to a part time counter assistant in a local pharmacy but I feel like being overweight could go against me cuz it hardly promotes the idea of being physically fit.

I have had enough of feeling sorry for myself all the time cuz there is no point, it just drags you down further.  Just wanna say sorry to you guys for neglecting the site lately and not being there through whatever your struggles may have been, but as I am feeling more on track now and have a lot more free time I am sure I can swing back at least once a day!

Love you guys, let’s just friggin’ DO THIS lol x